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But your eyes tell me you won't be there

It took us a while Because we were young and unsure With love on the line What if we both would need more But all your flaws and scars are mine Still falling for you // No one can lift me, catch me the way that you do I'm still falling for you Now I'm running away my dear From myself and the truth I fear My heart is beating I can't see clear How I'm wishing that you were here // You said you'd follow me anywhere But your eyes tell me you won't be there x

Stays x Fades

Learning to appreciate whatever I have now, no matter how it's gonna be. If it's meant to be, it will be. x

#lovelovelove

Major crush on myself. Finally gain enough courage or should I say had enough of frizzy and waist-long hair and super hasty hair washing and blow-drying, so SNIPPING it is. Feeling so light and duper happy can't stop swaying the hair hahaha Bye long long hair, not gonna see you in awhile! Alright back to HE. sigh.

Semester 4 x

That feeling when you're challenging yourself on something you really suck - is shiok af Last semester I challenge myself to try to overcome my model-phobia And so I'm kinda proud of what I overcome, and I even found some joy in concept model tbh. It's refreshing and new to me. This semester, time management. Ugh, it's a bitch. I could have it easy, but I joined 3 competition alongside with my already-busyaf-coursework I'm still a little unsure, cause 3 sounds like a lot to sacrifice. And by time management, I'm not only talking about work and study, I'm also trying to make more time for some people that matters. I've always been a family-centered person, people know that. But other than family, I'm pretty much a workaholic and always like some alone time, and friends outing. So, this time around, maybe I would try to see if its worth it, to give more time to someone. We will see. Anyway, the same a

Hold on to me

Too tired to sleep. x

RIP

真的很震惊 知道你真的走了 一再确认的手在微微发抖 我们真的不是很亲近 但是这是长这么大 最接近我的人发生意外 真的很难接受。 心里觉得闷得慌 再开电脑来确认那是你的身份证 眼泪才真的流了下来。 生命真的真的很脆弱。 那些喜欢飞车的人 那些喜欢边驾车边玩手机的人 真心的很讨厌 能不能多爱惜自己 仅仅一个实习时的前辈 都可以让我那么难受 我不敢想象真正亲近的人真的就这样走了的话 我要怎么面对 所以如果你把我当朋友 不要让我经历这样的事情 不要让我接受以后都见不到你的事实 就算我们不常见面 请好好照顾自己。 愿逝者安息。

First Time Ever

This is the first time I don't feel excited leaving KL to JB And the ever first time I can't wait to come back to KL The reason is yet to be known tho. I just feel less bounded in KL? Weird. Anyway, just wanna write this down cause it's So Weird? Should really be studying rn. Sigh, bye.

MIDNIGHT PLAYLIST // 2

英文歌有点腻了 今天来点怀旧的 就这样听了一整天的SHE 还有6天 今晚是个充满动力的晚上 准确一点已经是凌晨了 最近EQ偏低 没什么耐性 所以没事就带着耳机 SAY NO TO 杂音 其实还蛮多想说 但现在真的不是时候 下次吧 有缘的话 哈哈哈哈 Back to work.

Maybe

My moodswings these days are seriously slowing eating myself up. For no particular reason, my mood have been no where near to pleasant these days. The frustration that silently piled up inside me is suffocating. And the part that I have no idea why are these happening is making it worse. At least I'm not letting these frustrations onto people around me, yet. And I've been secretly and quite frequently giving myself a pat on my back for the increase in my EQ these days. Even I myself am surprised. Today, for instance, is an extreme emotional roller coaster ride. I didn't slept for a whole night trying to catch up to my schedule for the Crit this morning. My motivation is always running out by this time of the semester, when I need it the most. And I almost wanted to give up and just go to bed at dawn. I fell asleep on the desk top instead. Woke up 10 minutes later, feeling cranky. And I thought this shall be a cranky friday. But then, I saw a snacks that my

#

Miss home, came home, ended up missing it even more when I leave. Every fucking time.

*

It felt like a long time since you came across my mind. Someone asked about you out of the blue the other day. It felt weird, cause nothing came out from my mouth and I just smiled. Maybe I'm just too tired to talk about it again, or maybe I don't even wanna think about it. It's weird how time passed just like that, but all I remember about us, is the exhaustion. Relationship is very intriguing to me. The mere thought of it gives me a shiver in my heart. I used to hope for an LDR, it sounds comfortable to a person like me, who needs a huge space to myself. But it's different now, when you know you might really be experiencing it, and when you have someone in your mind, who might have to experience it with you. It's hard. I hate goodbyes, especially those that may be your last. Relationship is already hard, what more a long distance one. Arghhh. Seriously I should either go to bed or do my work. Goodnight.

MIDNIGHT PLAYLIST

夜越深 心越吵 脑越闹 喜欢这样的感觉

慵懒午后

Location:  Bev C'afe 54, Jalan Tan Hiok Nee, Bandar Johor Bahru, 80000 Johor Bahru, Johor, Malaysia Camera : Nikon D5100 Post process: Lightroom and Canva Just a lazy afternoon trying out new apps and new edit. Peace.

CHAPTER 22

So, new semester started, today. Shit. It's already 2016. Like what?! It's the first day of the semester and all I could ever think about is the next sem break. Model student is like this one ma. hahahaha I'm over the New Year New Me shit so yeah. Still the old me. I've never really sit down and thought about the past year. I thought it was unnecessary, but still it came to me while I was stuck in the traffic today. Today is not one of those great day so I was in a just-wanna-go-home-and-nap-and-forget kind of mood. Until pieces of memories and moments from 2015 came into my mind. And I literally just thought: Wow, my 2015 is so damn blessed. I've been to so many places I wanted to, even went to Bkk twice.... Also did things I've always wanted to, but never had the courage or time to do so, one of them is to learn guitar, and I did! Oh, but the diet plan is still a fail HAHAHA Of course it was not all smooth sailing.